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Position Statement Marriage God designed marriage to be a covenant union between one man and one woman for life. The institution of marriage began in the Garden of Eden with Adam and Eve. In Genesis 2:18-25, God saw that it was not good for the man to be alone, so He placed Eve at Adam’s side so that the two might share an exclusive, God ordained oneness of being, reserved for a husband and his one wife. Jesus affirms that a marriage covenant between a husband and wife is not simply a matter of human consent, but one of divine affirmation authentication. Thus, Jesus instructs us not to separate what God has joined together. (Matthew 19:4-6; Mark 10:6-9). Indeed, God regards marriage with such esteem that Paul compares the marriage covenant to the relationship between Christ and His church (Ephesians 5:22-33). Just as Christ is committed to His bride, the church, even unto death, so the husband ought to love and cherish his wife, without reserve (Ephesians 5:25-33). Likewise, the wife must lovingly respect her husband in a way that reflects the love and respect of the church for her Savior, Jesus Christ (Ephesians 5:22-24). Finally, scripture teaches that Christians should only marry other Christians (2 Cor. 14-16). We are not to be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. Divorce Given God’s high view of marriage, it comes as no surprise that God "hates divorce" (Malachi 2:16). Divorce was never part of God’s ideal plan (Matthew 19:8), even though He gave regulations to protect the wives of those who chose to rebel against God’s law (Deuteronomy 24:1-4). The Bible clearly teaches divorce was permitted due to hardness of heart (Matt. 19:8). Thus to divorce a spouse without cause is sin. The Bible also makes it clear that both parties in a divorce are not always culpable for sin. The Bible says that there are two types of justifiable divorce. Under these conditions, a Christian may divorce his or her spouse without sinning. ‘Justifiable’ Divorce - * Sexual Infidelity: According to Scripture, a Christian is permitted (but not required) to initiate divorce if there is sexual immorality on the part of his or her spouse (Matt. 19:9). The marriage covenant is built upon trust, loyalty, and commitment. Moreover, God designed the sexual union between a husband and his wife as the most vulnerable expression of that intimate trust. Thus, we must "let the marriage bed be undefiled" (Hebrews 13:4). When one spouse is sexually unfaithful, he or she defiles the marriage bed and breaks his or her covenant promise in a profound and devastating manner. In this circumstance, the offended spouse is not obligated to remain married. He or she may legitimately divorce the offending spouse (Matthew 5:32, 19:9; Mark 10:11). It is important to note, however, that the offended spouse is not required to divorce, but is merely allowed to divorce in this instance. In light of God’s character and the model of Christ’s love for the church, it is clear that God is greatly honored by genuine reconciliation whenever possible. Abandonment by a Non-Christian Spouse: Divorce is also permitted if a Christian spouse is left by an unbeliever. When a believer is married to a non-believer, and the unbelieving spouse leaves the believing spouse permanently, the abandoned, Christian spouse may be divorced from the non-believing spouse without sin (I Corinthians 7:15). Again, the offended spouse is not required to divorce the offending spouse. He or she is merely allowed to do so in this case. If the non-believing spouse wants to remain married, the believing spouse must not seek divorce (I Corinthians 7:12-13). The above instances are the only explicit examples under which divorce is justified. Under certain circumstances, a temporary separation may be advisable to gain peace for purposes of counsel. Such separations should be temporary and always for the purpose of eventual reconciliation. Remarriage If divorce has taken place for legitimate Biblical grounds, as outlined above, we believe that the offended spouse may remarry without sin (Matt 19:9; I Corinthians 7:15,28). A person in this situation is free from the bonds of his or her original marriage covenant. However, if one spouse divorces the other without legitimate Biblical grounds, he or she must "remain unmarried, or else be reconciled" to the estranged spouse (I Corinthians 7:10-12). Jesus makes it plain that one who remarries after an illegitimate divorce commits adultery (Matthew 5:32, 19:9; Mark 10:11-12). A Christian is always free to remarry after the death of a spouse (Romans 7:2-3; 1 Cor. 7:39).
The Grace and Forgiveness of God Illegitimate divorce, like all sin was paid for at the cross. That does not mean that we should "continue to sin that grace might increase" since God has called us to live holy lives as we reflect and enjoy the fullness of His glory (Romans 6). The sin of illegitimate divorce, like all sin, inhibits our fellowship with God. However, God still loves the divorced Christian unconditionally and the repentant Christian can enjoy the abundant Christian life, just as before the divorce (I John 1:9, 2:1-2; Romans 8:31-39).
The Experience of God Himself, and His anguish & suffering through Israel's spiritual Adultery Reading and studying the minor prophets (and even the major prophets) give a demonstration of the anguish that God Himself suffered with the spiritual adultery of Israel. God cries out with the hurt and betrayal that He feels. The intensity of God's feelings, and the sense of loss of the intimate relationship shows the devastation that adultery causes. Anyone that experiences such, can know that God has felt the same intensive pain. But then, the eventual joy of restoration wipes away the real tears and hurt. There is hope. |